A perfect date with my perfect guy: what it taught me about love
My friends always joke about how I have a “type,” but hey, let’s be honest here. Everyone has a “type.” It may be a specific look, or a specific personality that we’re drawn to, but we all know at least one thing we want in a partner. If I compiled a list of some of the things things I would want in a guy, it would go something like this: tall (six feet and over please!), British (because who doesn’t love a British accent?), smart, handsome, classy, kind and generous.
This past weekend, I met a guy who checked off all those boxes. He was a six foot three, British army officer studying medicine, who also happened to spend part of his gap year in Malaysia volunteering. Not to mention, looks-wise, he was my version of a full-on dream boat.
Now let me describe to you what my perfect date looks like: brunch in a beautiful town or city, and afterward, an afternoon stroll along a waterfront or beach. This kind of date was exactly what I got this past weekend. We went to brunch in Georgetown and walked along the waterfront, where he later proceeded to kiss me as boats were passing by. It was the picture perfect movie moment I had always asked for.
But, there was one thing that I was lacking. The excitement, the butterflies and the inability to stop smiling when I look back on the date now. If I stripped this date down to just the logistics, if I got rid of the checklist I have in my head and the preferences I stubbornly demand, this date was not extraordinary by any means.
When it comes down to the way I felt during and after the date, coupled with the quality of the conversations, I’ve had better dates. Even though this date ran as smooth as the butter that was on our table at brunch, it still wasn’t enough to make me giggle to myself and run off to tell my friends that I met (yet another) perfect match.
So if there’s one thing that this perfect date with the perfect guy taught me about love and dating, it’s this: everything could be peachy and perfect, but the feelings you have are what is going to justify what you really want.
There could be people out there who check off all my boxes of so-called requirements or preferences that I have and even though everything seems like a perfect fit on paper, it may not be the perfect fit after all. It really does come down to chemistry, and I honestly believed that if I met someone that I could define as my perfect guy, then that would be it, and it would be easy for me to fall for that, because what’s there not to like?
What I have noticed though, is when I think of the best date I had ever been on, it was with someone who didn’t check off all my boxes, and someone I had zero expectations for. I didn’t have high hopes to be with this person or for the date to be any more than average. Sometimes, it’s the ones you underestimate that surprise you the most.
So, even though this date with this wonderful guy was definitely one that I’ll remember as my movie-moment date, and one that raised the bar for male prospects everywhere, I have a feeling that that’s all it’s going to be. A memory. However, that still didn’t stop me from friending him on Facebook.